Mark Zuckerberg kills goats with laser guns.

“They say the seeds of what we will do are in all of us, but it always seemed to me that in those who make jokes in life the seeds are covered with better soil and with a higher grade of manure.” (Ernest Hemingway, A Moveable Feast)

“Capital is past savings accumulated for future production.” (Jackson Martindell)

"This is what I want in heaven... words to become notes and conversations to be symphonies." (Tina Turner)

"Everything that deceives may be said to enchant." (Plato)

“Ignorance is no excuse, it’s the real thing.” (Irene Peter)

"To slob" is an intransitive verb.

“A man of eighty has outlived probably three new schools of painting, two of architecture and poetry, and a hundred in dress.” (Joyce Carey)

“It takes two people to make you, and one people to die. That’s how the world is going to end.” (William Faulkner, As I Lay Dying)

"Death is the last and best reward for a life well lived." (Bob Weir)

"A kiss that is never tasted forever and ever is wasted." (from the 1934 song "For All We Know" with lyrics by Sam M. Lewis, music by J. Fred Coots, and sung by Billie Holiday on 1958's Lady in Satin, her penultimate record)

"Little wit in the head makes much work for the feet." (Anonymous)

“Don’t gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don’t go up, don’t buy it.” (Will Rogers)

"The city lifts its hand like a cripple, O my lord Shu-Sin,
It lies at thy feet like a lion-cub, O son of Shulgi.
O my god, the wine-maid has sweet wine to give,
Like her date-wine sweet is her vulva, sweet is her wine..."

(Sumerian love song, 3rd Millennium BCE)

“Winston Churchill is always expecting rabbits to come out of an empty hat.” (Field Marshall Archibald Wavell, 1st Earl Wavell)

"The Almighty has His own purposes. 'Woe unto the world because of offenses for it must needs be that offenses come but woe to that man by whom the offense cometh.' If we shall suppose that American slavery is one of those offenses which in the providence of God must needs come but which having continued through His appointed time He now wills to remove and that He gives to both North and South this terrible war as the woe due to those by whom the offense came, shall we discern therein any departure from those divine attributes which the believers in a living God always ascribe to Him. Fondly do we hope—fervently do we pray—that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away. Yet, if God wills that it continue until all the wealth piled by the bondsman's two hundred and fifty years of unrequited toil shall be sunk, and until every drop of blood drawn with the lash shall be paid by another drawn with the sword, as was said three thousand years ago so still it must be said: 'the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.'" (Abraham Lincoln's Second Inaugural Address, March 4, 1864)

“Corporations cannot commit treason, nor be outlawed, nor excommunicated, for they have no souls.” (Edward Coke)

"Marriage is the deep, deep peace of the double bed after the hurly-burly of the chaise longue." (Mrs. Patrick Campbell)

"Dream is the personalized myth, myth the depersonalized dream; both myth and dream are symbolic in the same general way of the dynamics of the psyche. But in the dream the forms are quirked by the peculiar troubles of the dreamer, whereas in myth the problems and solutions shown are directly valid for all mankind." (Joseph Campbell, The Hero with a Thousand Faces)

“Fashion, which elevates the bad to the level of the good, subsequently turns its back on bad and good alike.” (Eric Bently)